Respect the Personhood of Your Child
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 Do respect the personhood of your child and in so doing, promote his or her personal esteem.
Your child is a unique individual and is one-of-a-kind. As adults, most of us expect to be treated with some degree of respect and we are upset if we feel that we are being used, demeaned, denigrated or treated unfairly
Children have this same need and possibly more so since they have not yet developed the coping skills to deal with the negative stuff of life. Particularly if a child is a sensitive child, he/she will be especially vulnerable to all forms of disrespect.
How can we show respect for the personhood of a child?
- Correct your child in private. When a child is corrected in the presence of others this is often a misuse of power to use the influence of others to control the child’s behavior.
- Show a willingness to learn from your child. Your child is exposed to all kinds of influences and pressures in school and in the general social environment. The only way you can begin to understand the child’s perception of his/her world is to learn about it from him/her.
- Listen to your child and seek to understand his/her feelings. All of us really want someone to try to understand how we are feeling. When adults take the time and put forth the effort to do this kind of listening, it clearly communicates to the child that we really do care and that he/she is special.
- Refrain from teasing your child. Teasing is usually experienced as a “put-down” and is emotionally painful for the child.
The first step in gaining respect from a child is to give it to them.
Lowell E. Becker, M.D.
Child and Family Psychiatrist |
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